just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
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