I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize
