How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
try to milk me bitch
Randomize
