Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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