Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
Randomize
