sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
I swear, its like my old fuck buddies have a 6th sense for when I'm going to be daydrunk. Then they start texting me. And then I start sexting them
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
Randomize
