I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
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