Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Why can't burritos get me drunk
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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