i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
I mean, if there was a version of you with a penis, you'd fuck it...right? Like just outta curiosity at least
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
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