do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
