I'm laying in your front yard are you home
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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