member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
