Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
Who did Billy Mays play for?
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
