I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
Randomize