ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Randomize
