hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Randomize
