WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
