i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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