I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
Randomize
