Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
PANTIES FOUND
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