i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
