he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
My Valentine's Day plans just drastically changed... My F buddy just ran into my gf...in my driveway.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
