Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
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