Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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