love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
Randomize
