Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Randomize
