All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
I accidentally broke up with him while I was drunk which is really too bad since I'd just gotten a birth control perscription so we could start having sex.
Do you think he'd take me back if I said "dude, we need to get back together or this IUD is going to have an existential crisis for not realizing its full potential"?
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
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