Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
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