yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
My legs feel like baby dolphins
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
Randomize
