i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
