tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
Apparently mid blow job I started crying telling her how "Wonderful this blow job is"
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
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