You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Randomize
