Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
His nipple licking is glorious
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