I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
