ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize
