If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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