Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
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