8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
