You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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