At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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