What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Randomize
