Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Randomize
