hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
I just tried to light a cigarette with a tube of lipstick. If I had stayed in girl scouts maybe I could've made that happen.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
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