So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
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