Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
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