yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize
