Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Randomize
