Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
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