My nipple is on Facebook.
I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
Randomize
