This house was built for laser tag.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
Randomize
